Dying to feel alive.

Today i shall write about three things, all of them hopelessly unimportant.

First of all:
Sticky sweets. I quite like them because you don't have to hold on to them, they will hold on to you, and there is no demand of sharing them either since most people will assume that you have already licked them.
I also like the fact that long after they are gone you can still savour the sweet taste of rhubarb/strawberry/pear by sucking on your fingers. It's simply delightful!

Secondly:
My armpits. They smell of cucumber, it's a new marketing scheme I've come up with. I am nervously awaiting the hoards of guinea pigs (undoubtedly already moving towards my general direction from all over the country) to come and gnaw of my arms all the way to the sockets.
Ten year old girls all over the world will worship me if this works, it will the the ultimate way of attracting a new pet. If this works, this entry might very well also be my last as i have heard that it is hard to blog when you don't have arms.

The last of my late night pondering is this:

The difference between a habit and a tradition. Lets say you like to have a shower every evening. This is a habit. It is a good thing, by all means, but i have somehow always thought of a habit as a bad thing, even when you don't put the word 'bad' in front of it.
If you have one shower every year, lets say around Christmas time, then all of a sudden it is a tradition, and no longer a habit.
When i hear the word 'tradition' it always makes me think of mistletoe and hot cocoa in the snow. Nice things, in fact lovely things (if you ignore the fact that some obscure cults have traditions that includes the brutal slaughter of bright eyed, innocent children. That is not a very nice tradition).

So, my conclusion (at 4am this morning, so bear with me) is that if our belief in words were stronger then actual physical comfort, people would rarely wash. And if people rarely washed they would stink.

Shopping centres all over the world would be deserted, the smell would be too overwhelming. So, to put it simply: I am clearly in need of some therapy, and if people ever start to take this blog literally you will sooner or later find me dead somewhere, mutilated by minging, bankrupt retailers.

Now, if you will excuse me i am going for a shower.